RED PADDY LOOKING
TO MAKE A MATCH
The Old Man, my brother Mick and meself
were sitting around the radio listening to
Proud to Be Irish on the Siena radio station
88.3 FM as we usually do every Sunday
The Old Man uncorks a bottle of Hennessey
brandy. I knew that something was up. He
offered some to us, but we just looked away.
It isn't our favorite drink. We would prefer
water or buttermilk.
From listening to stories about the Old
Country, Mick and me immediately knew
that this session was about matchmaking.
The men of the family made the matches.
Love had nothing to do with it, and the
females had nothing to say in the matter.
But, Mick and me are a bit more docile
because the Aussie before us was a one
man dog that kept the woman of the house
She was determined that never again
would she be terrorized by the likes of
She took to dog training as pups. I got
a star place on my forehead at graduation.
But, Mick was jealous and ate it off.
The woman of the house went wild
when the Old Man brought the two
of us into the house as pups.
But, it all worked well and we have
had many good times together.
We have especially enjoyed running
free in the Helderbergs or on the
land in Delaware County and on
the Albany Muni Golf course in
winter when the ticks are few.
Summers, we have to be content
with walks around the hood.
We went to the beach on Long
Island once. I was very wary of
the vastness of the ocean as
compared to the pond we swim
in on the land. Mick was his
usual bold self, running into the
water and tasting it.
We had a nice run on the beach
but soon found ourselves being
pursed by law enforcement on
It seems dogs are banned from
We escaped. But, have never
gone back to such an unfriendly
So, at the Old Man's proding I seek a
young, Australian female farm dog ,of fine
stock, for the purposes of making a match.
We have to meet the parents to determine
that they are of good temperment, health
and possess excellent genes.
Mick and me passed our annual vet exams
with flying colors, in July. And why not?
Good genes. Good food, lamb and rice,
spuds, flax, extra virgin olive oil, buttermilk
and fresh eggs.
I am likely the largest Austrialian you will
ever see. A fine specimen. A block of a dog
with a barrel chest, green eyes and of very
good temperment. I weigh in at about 78
pounds. My coat is a thick auburn red.
I have a white bib and collar and Irish socks.
I have never been matched before. The Old
Man never neuters his dogs. So, I am ready.
Forget about love. This is strictly a business
venture, I do the job and the Old Man gets
the pick of the litter.
Mick complained bitterly. What about me.
Well, Mick is a fine dog too. He takes after
his father Merlin and is a spotted red merle.
Mick is extremely clever and intelligent. He
knows how to lower the rear window when
we go for a ride. I think he is endowed with
ESP and is skilled at mind reading. But, he
talks a lot and is a bit of a rake.
Mick is always ready for a match. But, not
very selective. Any four legged creature will
I take after my mother Cheyenne who was
a large red and white of very good temperment.
Mick and me were born to a litter of 9 in
Washington County, a decade ago. It was
our mother's third litter.
Mick inherits his travelling people
demeanor from his father. Both, are
great kissers. In the ear.
The farmer was named McCarthy, he
had come to Washington County from
Texas, bringing our parents with him.
They are of fine Aussie stock, used for herding
cattle and horses on the Texas High Plains.
Coincidentally, the McCarthy's and
O'Sullivan's joined up to defeat the
Norman advance into what is now West
Cork and Kerry, a thousand years ago.
So, how do you find me? Go to Jim
Coyne's house on New Scotland Ave
at Buckingham and Lenox (the one with
4 Coyne lawn signs out ...2 on Buckingham
and 2 on New Scotland, at the point
where New Scotland and Buckingham
meet. They will tell you where I live.
We are in a witness protection program
because of the letter we wrote to the
Jim Coyne has a couple of Shelties.
He is in the September 13 Democratic
The Old Man is waiting in the wings
to take on the winner of the Democratic
primary, but, first the Old Man must
win the Conservative primary, Thursday
September 13, Noon to 9 pm.
The Old Man is only doing what is
in his genes.
Something about liberty and saving
our Constitutional Republic.
Red Paddy O'Sullivan
PS You can get a look at Mick
and me - our photo is to the
upper right of the screen.
We are not illegals. And in
Albany, we vote.